THIS is how ewe deal with'em when they piss ewe off

Dear Mr. [Bigwhig]:

My name is [Your Name] and I am a now-former [Company {this one was to Verizon}] customer. I am sure that you have a very busy schedule, so I will attempt to be brief. I have experienced several difficulties at the hands of Verizon's local office and my problem still has not been resolved. I thought it best to contact someone who might be able to resolve this situation.

On [Specific Date], I signed up for Verizon service at our home, [Your Address] in [City ST]. Our phone service worked fine, until [fill in event]. We lost service on or about [Date]. I contacted Verizon via the Internet, and your company sent a techician who checked our inside wiring, our inside equipment, and your outside equipment. The technician said that our equipment and wiring were fine. He said that the problem was with some box or switch or other, up on one of Verizon's telephone poles. He said that he replaced the faulty equipment. We both rechecked the service and it had come back on.

A few weeks, and a couple of [events], later we, again, experienced problems with our service. We reported this. During the interim, we also signed up for your wire and maintenance plan, so that we would be protected, regardless of where the problem was. This time, when we reported a no-service complaint, we never even saw a technician. The Verizon representatives said that a technician came out and reported that the line was fine; however we never saw or heard from anyone--even though on the online form, I requested a specific date and time to speak with the technician personally. Sir, we still did not have service.

I reported a no-service complaint again on [Date]--for the third time in less than two months. I received an email that said that a technician had come out and determined that the telephone line was fine. However, again, we never saw this technician, nor were we informed of what date or time s/he would be here.

[SPECIAL NOTE: It is NEVER okay for a Verizon rep to check ANYTHING without making contact with you, the customer.]

Today, I received another email--one that advised me to contact Verizon at (xxx) 954-6400. This is your business office, so I called. During the next hour or so, I was transferred from your business office to repair--which was where I'd intended to call--to billing to collections and back to the business office. Each time, I was told that there was "nothing [the representative] could do". Finally, I was able to speak to a supervisor. H/She, however, proved to be even more confusing than anyone else I'd spoken with.

First she said that the problem was pre-existing; however, if the problem was not pre-existing from [Date] through [Date] , I fail to understand how it could be determined as a pre-existing condition on [Date] or [Date]. I signed up for the Verizon maintenance plan; however, I was unaware that this maintenance plan did not take effect for 30 days and that it does not cover pre-existing conditions. But even this does not make sense--we had no pre-existing conditions. The technician whom I did see and speak with told me that our equipment and wiring were fine.

Another thing I do not understand is this: How is it that the technician we did see was able to check our equipment, but the others that we were only told about were not? Our equipment is new and the wiring in the site for the Verizon service--a recently-added sunroom--is also pretty new. Where on earth could we have a pre-existing condition indoors? And how can a technician determine that the problem is an indoor pre-existing condition--without examining the indoor equipment and wiring?

This situation has proven to be very frustrating, to say the least. Our service has been disconnected due to non-payment. Mr. [Bigwhig], would you go to a grocery store and hand the cashier money if you were not receiving any food? In one of my no-service complaints, I indicated that we were not going to pay our bill until we received regular, uninterrupted telephone service. I don't think that's asking too much. I also indicated that I believed we were owed approximately ten days of credit. I think that's fair because to be honest, if I said that we received regular, uninterrupted service for even half the time we've been signed up with Verizon, Sir, I would be being very generous.

Mr. [Bigwhig], I am not a person who seeks to take advantage of anyone. I am a single parent who is returning to college and earning my first bachelor's degree, I am a deacon in my church, and I am a safe and responsible citizen. That said, I will NOT pay a bill for service that I am not receiving, and I will NOT stand for a corporation whose employees refuse to give the service they expect to be paid for. Any intervention you can provide would be most appreciated. If this situation is not resolved, I will no longer employ Verizon for any of my local, long-distance, or Internet connection needs--and it will not matter to me whether my name is cleared; as far as I'm concerned, having a bad name with a dishonest company cancels any detrimental effects I may incur as a result.

Thank you, and have a pleasant day.

Sincerely,
/signed/
YOUR NAME
YOUR ADDRESS
CITY ST ZIP
(XXX) XXX-XXXX (VOIP)
YOUR EMAIL (E)

Sissies'n'bros, nothin scares Verizon like the letters VOIP. I sent this email on Friday. This morning I got two calls, each from a different Verizon manager--and neither number started with that 954 shit. The second caller also left his cell phone number. I expect that our land line service will change very soon, very soon, and I expect that the bill in question will be renegotiated.

So, here's the lesson, kids ---> When the local yokels piss you off, don't do that "work your way up" shit. Nonono sweetiecakes, you start at the TOP cuz that's where you get IMMEDIATE results, specially if ya know where it'll hurt most when ya hit'em.

That's all for today, my sweet little cherry plums . . .

Cheers!
RX